If I Had a Million Dollars...

This song is SO my son and I.

(Well, except for the John Merrick part)

If you can find it on the internet and listen to while reading the lyrics, I guarantee it will get stuck in your head.  It's quite a catchy tune.  And you can just picture Winston and I roaming the backyard singing it together.

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If I Had $1,000,000.

By the Barenaked Ladies

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

I'd buy you a house (I would buy you a house)

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

I'd buy you furniture for your house

(Maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman)

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

I'd buy you a K-Car (a nice Reliant automobile)

If I had $1,000,000 I'd buy your love.

If I had $1,000,000

I'd build a tree fort in our yard.

If I had $1,000,000

You could help, it wouldn't be that hard.

If I had $1,000,000

Maybe we could put a little tiny fridge in there somewhere

(We could just go up there and hang out.

Like open the fridge and stuff, and there'd be foods laid out for us

with little pre-wrapped sausages and things, Mmmmmm.

They have pre-wrapped sausages

but they don't have pre-wrapped bacon.

Well, can you blame them.  Yeah)

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

I'd buy you a fur coat (but not a real fur coat that's cruel)

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

I'd buy you and exotic pet (Like a llama or an emu)

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

I'd buy you John Merrick's remains (All them crazy elephant bones)

If I had $1,000,000 I'd buy your love.

If I had $1,000,000

We wouldn't have to walk to the store

If I had $1,000,000

We'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more

If I had $1,000,000

We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner.

(But we would eat Kraft Dinner.  Of course we would,

we'd just eat more.

And buy really expensive ketchup with it.

That's right, all the fanciest Dijon Ketchup.  Mmmmmm)

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

I'd buy you a green dress (but not a real green dress, that's cruel)

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

I'd buy you some art (a Picasso or a Garfunkel)

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

I'd buy you a monkey (haven't you always wanted a monkey?)

If I had $1,000,000 I'd buy your love.

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

If I had $1,000,000 (If I had $1,000,000)

If I had $1,000,000

I'd be rich.

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I laugh every time I hear this song!

If I had a million dollars I'd buy a little beach front on Kauai.

But that would cost more than a million dollars.

So nevermind.